Elon Musk is moving back into politics. Can’t he take up a new hobby instead? Arwa Mahdawi

“You know, I’ve generally found that when I get involved in politics, it ends up badly,” Elon Musk mused on Nikhil Kamath’s podcast in November.

Oh, we know, Elon, we most definitely know. The world is still reeling from the tech billionaire’s little experiment in politicking last year. Musk’s “department of government efficiency” (Doge) slashed federal jobs, dismantled foreign aid programmes and left a trail of chaos in its wake. It’s not clear whether any taxpayer money was saved, but experts are warning a lot of lives will be lost. By one calculation, there could be about 14 million excess deaths across the globe by 2030 if the US fails to restore aid funding. Thanks, Elon!

Musk’s stint in politics didn’t just end badly for people reliant on US aid; his own brand took a beating. Last August, a Gallup poll found he was the most unpopular person in a list of global figures. He also had a highly publicised fallout with Donald Trump last summer. As you may remember, Musk declared that he was going to start his own political party and Trump called his former “first buddy” a “TRAIN WRECK”. Musk also spent a lot of time trolling the president about the Epstein files. “Time to drop the really big bomb,” Musk posted on X in June, “@realdonaldtrump is in the Epstein files. That is why they have not been made public.”

But that’s all ancient history. It would seem a lot of forgiving, forgetting and deleting of inopportune social media posts has been done; now it’s time to brace ourselves for the Trump-Musk Bromance Part Two: Electric Boogaloo. Over the weekend Musk, who seems to have suddenly lost interest in the Epstein files, posted a blurry photo on X of him dining with Donald and Melania at Mar-a-Lago. They’d all had a “lovely dinner”, he gushed in the post, adding: “2026 is going to be amazing!” That dinner, by the way, took place shortly after the US captured the Venezuelan president Nicolás Maduro and his wife. Was Musk in such high spirits because Trump was promising to invade Greenland next, and turn it into a Tesla factory? Or did the president tell Musk, who is obsessed with the UK, that he’d “liberate the people of Britain” for him, as a little treat? I guess we’ll find out.

Musk isn’t just breaking bread with Trump; he’s also giving the Republican party a lot of dough again. Axios reported in December that Musk had quietly been cutting big cheques for the midterms. On New Year’s Day, Musk made his renewed support public by responding to a post by a conservative influencer claiming Musk was “going all-in funding Republicans”. Musk appeared to confirm this with the statement: “America is toast if the radical left wins.” Looks like the billionaire has now abandoned his third party plans and is back on the Trump train.

So who do we have to thank for two of the most awful men in the world joining forces again? Well, the ghost of Charlie Kirk for one. Before he was murdered, Kirk talked about how he was desperate to get Trump and Musk to reconcile. And his death seems to have achieved that: Kirk’s memorial in September brought the two men together for their first public appearance since the feud. Both Musk and the White House X account posted photos of the pair sitting and chatting with the caption: “For Charlie.”

JD Vance also played a role in getting the pair to kiss and make up. According to a December report by the Washington Post, Vance has been very busy brokering a truce and getting Musk to rethink his third party plans. The vice-president obviously has his own reasons for wanting to keep things cordial with the richest man in the world. Trump keeps insisting that his “health is perfect” and joking about a third term, but he’s not going to be around for ever. Musk’s unlimited funds played a large part in getting Trump back in the White House and you imagine Vance is keen to keep the money spigot on.

Unfortunately, I don’t have billions of dollars I can use to get politicians to do my bidding. But I do have a wealth of unsolicited advice for Musk. Please sir, I’m begging you, can you take up a nice hobby? Or spend some quality time with your army of children, perhaps? Or get in one of your rockets and go for a very long ride in outer space? Just do something that isn’t meddling in the government! Because I have a feeling this new political act is going to end very badly for everyone.